How many times has this little human pooped today? Has it been two hours since she breastfeed? Is this room too hot? Maybe it’s too cold; let me Google “room temp newborns”. Okay, room’s fine but her poop did look kinda weird. Let me Google that too. Awake nursing at 3am… I wonder what’s considered a normal sleeping pattern for this age? Does that funny noise mean she’s hungry but hasn’t woken herself up yet? Which blanket is best to swaddle her in? Are there better ways to position her arms when swaddling? What are the pros and cons of swaddling in the first place? Let me Google that…
What in the world did new parents do without Google at their finger tips? Stress about “doing it right” less, perhaps? Prior to having my precious little angel, I managed to avoid the parenting forums pretty successfully. I did my research on a few important topics, discussed things with medical professionals, my husband, and few close friends, but, beyond that, did not seek input from many and steered clear of the black hole of conflicting parenting information known as the world wide web (Actually, is it still called that? Maybe I should Google it.)
Then, the miracle of life happened. I was scheduled for a c-section but ended up going into labor a day early, so all our plans got bumped up 24 hours. As I waited in triage with my husband, digging my fingernails into his arm with each contraction, I was in pain and anxious to get things going but mostly excited to finally meet the little lady who I had carried around inside of me for the last 9+ months. “Nervous” was not on my list of emotions. All I cared about was hearing my baby’s first cry and feeling her touch, her announcement to the world that she had arrived.
[Sidenote – I have never heard such a beautiful sound in my life. I’m not sure anything else will ever, EVER come close.]
In the days in the hospital that followed, nurses and doctors served as my Google, answering whatever questions me and my husband had (which ended being quite a few). We totally had this under control. Finally, discharge papers in hand, we confidently went out into the universe, ready to be the best parents ever. We got as far as the parking lot.
One thing that the accelerated timeline had not allowed for was car seat installation prior hospital visit. While it was installed correctly and the nurse didn’t see anything wrong, as soon as we placed our precious cargo inside, we realized the straps had to somehow be adjusted. Have you every tried to adjust straps on a carseat? Have you ever taken a Mensa test? Time for the first parenting Google.
Today, my baby’s 9 days old. I’m recovering from surgery (with plenty of help from family), breastfeeding, sort of sleeping, staring at her with complete amazement and love, and generally feeling like a badass for successfully going through what my body just went through. Seriously, I have never been so proud of myself on a physical level. Despite the weakness I feel right now, I have a newfound appreciation for how amazing this body is. It seems cheesy to say/write, but I am truly in awe of my capability to grow a human, go through the intense c-section process, and somehow magically start breastfeeding. I mean, WHAT IN THE WORLD?!
Now comes the hard part, helping this miracle grow and being the best mom I can be. NOW I’m nervous. I’m also really good at Googling with one hand during late night breastfeeding sessions. I am quickly learning though, that the black hole of parenting advice online is just as conflicted and confusing after birth as is it before, possibly more so. Darn.
But, badass vibes in hand and amazingly supportive husband by my side, I’m confident we’ll figure this parenting thing out alright, I think… With the help of Google, our pediatrician, my doctor, friends and family, and good dose of parenting love and instinct, we’re giving it our best shot. Get ready baby girl, your mom and dad have no idea what truly lies ahead but can’t wait to experience it all as a family ❤